17 March 2023

Episode 224: Tips On How To Be a Present, Working Parent

0Frameworks

6Insights

Listen

Insights & moments

The myth-busts, hot takes, explainers, and tools worth keeping.

Myth Buster· 1

Myth Buster06:00

Older Children Do Not Automatically Make Parenting Easier

The demands of parenting change rather than simply disappearing as children grow. Babies require constant physical supervision, while older children bring competing activities, changing wants, and a calendar that can consume a parent's own schedule.

Babies demand constant physical presence
Older children create complex logistical and emotional demands
A parent's schedule can become organized around multiple activities

“it's actually more difficult as they get older because their wants it's their wants may be different and they may change but they're just as…”
Jennifer Cohen · 06:30

“my schedule now is not my own it's like what can I do around the schedule of my two kids”
Jennifer Cohen · 06:30

#parenting#children#scheduling

Hot Take· 1

Hot Take04:00

Focused Presence Beats Being Visibly Distracted

Working where children can see you may feel like a compromise, but visibility is not the same as attention. Finishing work efficiently elsewhere can create a shorter, more focused period of real availability afterward.

Physical visibility does not guarantee meaningful attention
Interruptions can make both work and family time less effective
Dedicated focus can create more genuinely present time later

“I choose to do it because I want to be visible to my children”
Jennifer Cohen · 04:00

“it's about having time that you are very present and focused as opposed to fragmented and fractured”
Jennifer Cohen · 05:00

#presence#focus#working parents

Story· 1

Story08:00

The Hidden Time Cost of Holding a Device Boundary

Jennifer's refusal to immediately hand over an iPad helped protect creativity, outdoor play, and activity, but it also stretched a short recording session into hours. The story recognizes that maintaining a parenting boundary can be valuable precisely because it is harder than the convenient alternative.

Device limits can protect more active and creative behavior
Maintaining a boundary may make the parent's day harder
Occasional exceptions do not erase the underlying intention

“you really like them to be creative and be outside and be active that's really commendable and you never like relent no matter no matter…”
Co-host · 08:00

“it does it is time consuming to do it to do it better not to do it right”
Jennifer Cohen · 08:30

#screen time#boundaries#parenting

Takeaway· 3

Takeaway02:00

Why No Working Parent Is Truly Self-Made

Building a career while raising children depends on support from family, friends, and colleagues. Acknowledging that help is more honest and useful than pretending one person can manage every responsibility alone.

Working and parenting well at the same time is genuinely difficult
Reliable support can come from family, friends, or workmates
Giving helpers credit challenges the myth of being self-made

“if you are somebody who is a working parent God bless you it is not easy I am with you it is hard”
Jennifer Cohen · 02:00

“I think that nobody is self-made in this world I don't think anyone can do a job on their own without having really good support…”
Jennifer Cohen · 02:30

#working parents#support systems#career

Takeaway07:00

Children's Schedules Turn Efficiency Into a Necessity

A crowded family calendar compresses the time available for personal and professional work. The episode's own disrupted recording shows how choosing a pleasant or visible workspace can undermine the efficiency it was meant to support.

Plan personal work around fixed commitments for the children
Use limited work windows deliberately
Judge a workspace by its effect on completion, not just comfort or appearance

“you have to create a situation where you are way more efficient with your time actually you got to be way more efficient with your…”
Jennifer Cohen · 07:00

“I think it's become the the antithesis of what I was trying to accomplish which is efficiency”
Jennifer Cohen · 07:30

#efficiency#time management#family schedule

Takeaway09:00

Balance Is Not Real—Practice Efficiency and Patience

The closing message rejects perfect daily balance as an unrealistic standard for working parents. Progress looks more like learning efficiency and patience while allowing for imperfect days without turning them into personal failure.

Stop treating perfect balance as the goal
Expect parenting and work to remain an ongoing adjustment
Use self-compassion alongside efficiency and patience

“don't be so hard on yourself balance is not a real thing what you do learn is efficiency and you do learn patience because you…”
Jennifer Cohen · 09:00

#balance#self compassion#patience