Why Not Me Mentality
Replace automatic self-exclusion with repeated action and persistence
- Difficulty
- Moderate
- Time to result
- ~ongoing to results
- Steps
- 4
- Confidence
- 93%
The Why Not Me Mentality is a reframing practice for interrupting automatic self-exclusion. When another person's achievement triggers pedestal thinking, replace the assumption that they possess some inaccessible special quality with the question, “why not me?” The question is not meant to substitute confidence for effort. It gives you permission to attempt the work, persist through resistance, and judge yourself from evidence rather than anticipation. Repeating the question alongside repeated action gradually makes possibility feel less exceptional and more personally available. The output is not guaranteed success; it is a fair attempt that is no longer blocked by an untested belief about who is allowed to succeed.
Origin
In this Habits & Hustle solo episode, the host explains the question she repeatedly uses to stop putting achievers on pedestals and to approach difficult goals with persistence.
Core principles
- 01Do not disqualify yourself before attempting the work
- 02Other people's achievements are evidence of possibility, not proof of superiority
- 03Belief becomes more automatic through repeated thought and action
- 04Persistence matters more than imagined specialness
How to run it
- 1
Catch the pedestal story
Notice when you explain another person's success by treating them as inherently more special or capable than you. Name the comparison before it becomes a reason not to try.
Pro tip Use admiration as a signal to inspect your own automatic assumptions.
Watch out Do not confuse respecting expertise with declaring the outcome impossible for you.
- 2
Ask why not me
Turn “that could never happen to me” into “why not me?” Use the question to reopen an option you had dismissed without evidence.
Pro tip Apply the question to one specific outcome rather than to a vague wish.
Watch out The question creates permission to act; it does not prove that success is guaranteed.
- 3
Make a real attempt
Do the work required to test the possibility instead of deciding from the sidelines. Let effort produce evidence about your ability and willingness.
Pro tip Define a first action small enough to begin today.
Watch out Positive self-talk without action leaves the original belief untested.
- 4
Repeat until it becomes identity
Return to the question and the work whenever self-doubt resurfaces. Repetition makes the new response increasingly automatic over time.
Pro tip Use “why not me?” as a daily prompt before working on the goal.
Watch out Do not interpret one setback as evidence that you never belonged in the attempt.
In the wild
A capable employee keeps admiring people who move into leadership while assuming they have a special quality she lacks. She asks “why not me?”, identifies the experience the role actually requires, and submits an application after preparing concrete examples of her work. This does not guarantee the job; it replaces an automatic no with a real test.
→ She gains evidence about her readiness instead of rejecting herself in advance.
An aspiring creator sees established people as uniquely gifted and delays publishing. He uses the question to choose one small project, works through the uncomfortable first attempts, and repeats the process rather than treating early imperfection as a verdict.
→ Consistent attempts replace pedestal thinking with practical learning.
Common mistakes
Using belief instead of effort
The mentality is an entry point to hard work and repeated attempts, not a substitute for them.
Assuming success is guaranteed
“Why not me?” creates a fair opportunity to test yourself; it does not promise the same result as someone else.
Stopping after one setback
The host's mechanism depends on trying repeatedly and refusing to turn difficulty into immediate self-disqualification.
Is it for you?
Best for
It is best for capable people who want an outcome but count themselves out before making a serious attempt.
Not ideal for
It is not ideal for situations where missing skills, resources, or risks require a concrete feasibility plan rather than a mindset shift alone.
From the transcript
“I always go to everything with this idea of why not me you know like why not me”
“the only difference between somebody else and you is that they tried and they never gave up and they believed in themselves”
“all it takes is you making the choice and the decision that you are gonna start thinking differently and just wake up every day with…”
From the episode
Episode 566: Are You Limiting Your Own Potential?